Intimate Relationships: Communication is Key
Most people would say that they are interested in increasing the intimacy in their relationships. Intimate relationships thrive with the right kind of communication. It is what you say and what you do that make the difference in deepening intimacy. The following tips are tools to go beyond the norm and build a more intimate relationship.
Needs
You will make it a lot easier for your lover if you communicate your needs. They cannot read your mind. So let them know. Start by asking if you are meeting all their needs. This will give them a chance to share with you. Listen carefully and make mental notes. Do not get defensive, take the information, think through it, and make a plan to meet your lovers needs. The conversation should then easily transition into a focus on your needs.
Praise
When your lover does something that you really enjoyed or appreciated, let them know! Celebrate the small things as well as the large things. Everyone likes their efforts to be noticed and appreciated. From taking out the garbage, to providing sensual pleasure, all positive acts can and should be noted and praised!
Honest Feedback
Enjoy the things that you do for each other. Seek to grow together as you give each other honest feedback. As discussed in the Needs section, a great way to approach this sensitive subject is to ask your partner for their feedback first. Asking “What can I do to be better?” sets the tone for a open conversation. Never accuse or raise your voice. Speak the truth in loving ways and in a safe, trusting context.
Expectations
Everyone has expectations for their relationship. Each of you should take some time to make a list of your expectations and share them with each other. Start with the things that are most important. Let your partner know how they currently meet your expectations and give some additional examples of ways they could improve. Often small changes can make a huge difference in creating intimate relationships. But you’ll never know if you don’t ask!
Desires and Dreams
Intimate relationships are formed by sharing the deepest desires and dreams of your soul with your partner. Share your passions and aspirations. By opening up to each other you share dreams and understand the person on a deeper, more intimate level.
Adventures and Fantasies
Keep your relationship spicy by sharing your dream adventures and fantasies with each other. This information is generally top secret, which is exactly why sharing it builds intimacy. Have fun making your lovers desires come true for an anniversary, birthday, or when you need to spice things up a bit.
Plans
Talk about your plans for the near and distant future. Knowing the future plans of your partner is very important for creating intimacy in relationships. You learn more about them, you may be able to help them move in the direction of their dreams, and you can start to see if and how you fit into their near and/or distant future. If you see a long term future with each other, start making plans together. Start weaving your plans together and unifying your visions for the future.
Take some time to communicate with each other. Start with these topics for building intimate relationships. Dig deeper on certain subjects and tailor your questions to your lover. Showing interest and learning more about each other is a great way to start developing intimate relationships.
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